Monster Destruction
by AnbuRidia
Summary: Nobody said it would be easy...  Nobody said it would be this hard...    WARNING:CHARACTER DEATH DON'T LIKE DON'T READ!
1. BooBoo

**Disclaimer: I do not own "Naruto" or any characters pertaining to "Naruto"**

AN:I wrote this in a depressed mood. Its really angsty and a bit disturbing...

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>I love this kind of anyways it mainly focuses on Naruto, a depressed boys point of view. Its during the academy days <em><strong>WARNING CHARACTER DEATH DONT LIKE DONT READ<strong>_

Alone.

Hated

It was always like this.

They hated me I ignored them...kind of.

Its hard to be the only one.

Its hard to be the only outcast.

Alone.

Always alone.

I walked down the street seeing them all. The happy kids. The ones who hated me. They hugged their parents and waved their goodbyes. They skipped merrily smiling all the while.

I tried to hide my face. I was used to seeing them happy. I had already accepted I wouldn't, couldn't, be like them. I would try to be happy but it never worked. I knew it wouldn't. I tried to plaster a fake smile but all I got was a sting right behind my eyes. Tears were threatening to pour out. I blinked them a way fast. I didn't need another scar or bruised body.

They would hurt me if I cried. Sasuke Uchiha, Kiba Inuzuka, Shikamaru Nara, and Choji Akimichi. If I cried they would call me weak.

I rushed to school in fear I would be late. I didn't need another lecture from Iruka sensei. I almost made it when I tripped and scraped my elbow. I sucked in air as the tears came. I tried my best to hold them but they came. I examined my scrape. It wasn't bad but it still hurt. I watched as it closed and sniffled a bit when a hand reached down. I took it without thinking and suddenly realized with a sense of dread who's hand it was. Sasuke Uchiha's.

I was jerked to my feet only to be pushed back down scraping another elbow. "whats wrong crybaby? Got a boo boo?" I looked down hiding my eyes in my hair. I stood up on two very shaky legs just to be pushed down again. "I pushed you down because I wanted you on the ground" I just looked down with a blank face. "Now what are you doing going to school? You got balls ill admit but you wont if you come back here." I looked up and anger filled my eyes then fear as he stood above me holding a kunai knife. "Please Sasuke I have to go to school to be a ninja." tears threatened as I felt a slight pinch and sting being my eyes. One tear slipped out and I turned deathly pale. "Oh? A tear? You know your a wussy Uzumaki." He spit in my direction and began walking away laughing at me. Then the tears flooded out.

I raced home to avoid the others. I knew I wasn't going anywhere big with my life so school wasn't important to me. Sure I wanted to be a ninja very very bad but it was not going to be easy. I guessed probably wouldn't be aloud to be a ninja so I didn't try. And then there was the problem with the village. They all, for reasons unknown, hated me.

I stepped into my apartment. The walls were covered in holes with small black charred pieces dangling off of them. The floor was covered in text books. Letters and drawings strewn everywhere. I stepped towards my bed and collapsed into my blood stained sheets as my body wracked with sobs. I curled my knees up to my chest and rocked slowly back and forth burying my face in between my arms I sobbed loader and loader until my throat was raw and all that came out was a choking noise. Then I just cried quietly to myself until I was asleep.

AN: well its a very angsty fic but it turned out better than I thought it would. Please review and tell me what you think thanks guys.


	2. Why do they hate me

**AN: Sorry for the wait. Lol had writers block...again T.T. Well I hope you enjoy!**

**I was listening to "welcome to my life" by simple plan. It was my inspiration. I recommend you listen to it before this chappy to get the mood XD. *cough* anyways :) ON WITH THE STORY**

Naruto POV:

I woke at about five to find the sun shining warm beams on my still wet cheeks. I was on the floor with a large bruise on my head and my sheets were shredded to bits. I had warm blood trickling from a scratch mark on my back

Another nightmare.

I stood up wincing as I realized my shirt was stuck to my raw wound. Sighing in frustration I crossed the destroyed bedroom and stepped into the bathroom. I peeled off my shirt to examine the wound. It was jagged and ripped across my left shoulder I could see small strings of my muscle sticking out as well as a chunk of meat. It was bad and as soon as I saw it I felt dizzy. The room swayed and so did I. I knelt down clutching my stomach as my food forced its way into the bathtub. I took deep breaths and let them out slowly. I stood to my feet slowly in fear I would vomit again. I staggered to a small closet just outside of my bathroom and grabbed a towel. Feeling dizzy again I rushed to the tub and heaved what little food was left in my stomach. Turning the shower on I rinsed the vomit down the drain. I stepped into the shower and turned it on the hottest setting letting it scorch my skin I scrubbed my body until it was . Stepping out of the shower I dried myself off. Walking out of the bathroom I dropped the towel and slipped on a pair of boxers. I stepped to my closet and slipped on my usual garb and headed out to the academy.

I reached the school realizing I was early. At least I would be able to go to school today. I slid open the shogi screen doors and stepped into the bright classroom to find only sakura and ino arguing about who was earlier. Frowning a bit I lay my head on my desk lost in thought. I was so spaced out I jumped in surprise when iruka sensei lay his hand on my new wound. He couldn't see it but he looked concerned.

"Naruto can I see you during kunai practice. We need to talk."

Not having the energy to argue or object I just nodded and lay my head back down wincing and gasping when he patted my back and walked to his desk full of graded papers.

About twenty minutes before class started sasuke entered the room and stepped to his seat and ignoring his fan-girls. He pulled a crisp piece of paper from a binder scribbled words on it balled it up then tossed it at me. I unfolded it reading it with a look of horror on my face. It read:

"I'm_ going to kill you if you come back. Don't show your face here again!_"

That's when I snapped. I was sick of his threats and I was definitely sick of him. I stood to my feet clenched my fist and slammed into his jaw. Pulling back I leaped at him letting all my body weight fling him to the ground. I grabbed his hair and banged his head repeatedly on the smooth wooden floor. I would have killed him if iruka sensei hadn't pulled me off. He was unconscious.

"Naruto! That is unacceptable!" iruka sharply screamed in my face.

Tears streamed from my eyes as I looked iruka in the eyes finally taking off my mask and letting the pain and hatred show on my face. Then I ran as far as I could. I ran to the village gates and stopped as I vomited water. It was all I had left inside of me. My knees buckled beneath me and nobody was there to catch me.

Everything went black

AN: YOSH! I had to hurt sasuke he was being an ass :P

Well ill post chapters faster if you hit a button called the


	3. Been where you have

**AN: This is my third chappy haha. Thanks for all of the support guys! Your awesome! I was listening to strawberry gashes when I wrote this.**

**ONWARD WE GO!**

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Naruto's POV:

I couldn't feel my body. I guess I should have been grateful to that. But I wasn't. I had no idea where I was and I was completely terrified. With an unimaginable amount of effort I opened my heavy lidded eyes. It was bright and I could see only a plain roof.

"Naruto?"

Who was that?

"Naruto can you hear me? It's Iruka sensei. Listen your going to be okay." I felt him slip his hand behind my head and lift it to place a plain looking pillow beneath my head. I could see the room now. And myself. I was hooked to several machines and had enough tubes and needles in me to be classified a pincushion. I could only identify a few machines and that was the IV drip,and the heart monitor. I glanced to see Iruka's face filled with many emotions. He looked like he had been crying. I noticed he glanced at my arms filled with self inflicted scars. Some were strawberry red and others so old they were wrinkled with age. His eyes frequently flickered to them then my eyes and back repeatedly. Self consciously I twisted my arms to an angle to hide them. "Why Naruto?" I looked away. "Naruto I can help you." "No." I said very softly "But Naruto I-" "I don't need help." I said a bit louder. "Naruto your being stubborn just let me help you" he said sternly. "I know you need help." "With what?" I whispered. He didn't answer. "With what" I said just above a whisper. "Yourself" I waited but he didn't say any more. "What about me?" I retorted. "Being alone?" I said sharply. "What about me?" I shouted. "I'm a monster! You HATE me!" I sat up quickly. "You ALL do!" I stood "Naruto lay back down!" I ripped the cords and needles out of my flesh causing scarlet red blood to ooze out of my arms. "IM A MONSTER! LOOK AT ME! I DON'T NEED HELP! JUST LEAVE ME!" I was screaming now and I had tears flooding down my bloody cheeks. "IT'S NOT FAIR! YOU HATE ME! JUST STOP LYING! WHY DID YOU SAVE ME? WHY? JUST LET ME DIE! I JUST CANT TAKE THE PAIN ANYMORE! THE LONELIENESS IS AGONIZING!" I felt extremely dizzy. My skin turned a sickly pale and my cheeks flushed to almost the color of the blood rolling off my fingertips. The room began to sway and spin. My knees collapsed beneath me with a loud snap and I fell only to be caught by Iruka sensei. I was full out wailing by now. My ears were ringing and my body convulsed I violent spasms. I couldn't hear anything all I saw was Iruka's lips moving and a few medic ninja rushing into the room. I could barely move my head and all I could see was Iruka's vest once green had been died red by blood. It took me a second but I realized it was mine. I could see blood running down my chest and could just barely taste the irony taste of it. I guess I was vomiting blood. I could tell what was happening but just faintly. I could hear a very loud screaming. The voice was trying to get the medics to leave. It was mine I was kicking and could hear my words being drown out by the blood gurgling in my throat. I was kicking and punching and lashing out at everything. I felt a bit weaker after every slash, every punch, every movement. I could see Iruka crying. I heard a medic call a name I couldn't comprehend. A jounin with very tall white hair stepped in and held me down with no effort. I was kicking and screaming. The wailing eased into just tears. I was begging this man to kill me. He just stared at me with a look of interest in his only visible eye. His leaf forehead protector concealed one eye. And I saw him wince when I asked how hard it is to kill somebody. All he said was. "With your power not long at all" he slowly lifted me and placed me into the bed looking into my eyes. He practically read my mind " Suicide is selfish. And it is a very hard thing to do. I've been where you have. You'll get through this. Just wait." and with that he just disappeared in a whirl of dust and leaves.

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**AN: I had to stop there. If I didn't this chapter would be waaaayyy to long. Please review. No scorches or burns but constructive is VERY welcome. I hope you guys liked it.**

**WARNING: I am having internet problems so updates will be far apart but I will upload multiple at a time. -shoots computer with a gerbil gun- okies next chappy :P**


	4. Freedom

** AN: thankies for continuing my ff. Like I said sorry for it being late not my fault. Last was angsty but this chapter shall -mumbles under breath the word hopefully- be even angstier! I got comments on ow rushed it was. Its not really a story about his depression its more about him healing and mending mentalwonds. And as for character death you will find out plz stop pming me about it...**

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** Naruto's POV:**

I was conscious this time. But I pretended to sleep. Iruka had to be literally pushed out the door to go teach thus I was alone. I examined my state of body. It was bad. I had long gashes running up and down my arms from where I ripped my cords out. My knuckles were swollen and black. They were broken. I felt a cracked rib and a broken ankle. It hurt. Not just physically. But mentally. Then I got the idea. One I knew would be greatly celebrated. My death. Suicide. I tried to find a reason not to but every time I came close I found more reasons to continue. My hand slowly slipped to the long IV cord in my right arm. I slowly slid it out beginning to chuckle a bit. Once out I held it against my wrist. I held it there contemplating a bit. Before I could change my mind I slowly pressed it into my veins. Sliding it across I stared at the scarlet blood flowing out of my wrist. It was beautiful. It was my end. Like little red rivers snaking out of my arms. After every drop I felt more free. I felt safe. I lifted the needle and brought it down once again. The blood flowed out quicker now and with it my life. I began speaking curses to Sasuke, to the villagers, to Iruka, to happiness. I pressed my finger into the blood and began writing things on the sheet. I guess in all the excitement I didn't notice a nurse rushing towards me. She snatched the needle away from me yelling for help. I began laughing hysterically and yelling "It's all over! I'm finally free." I had tears running down my face as my loud laughter ended in body shaking coughs. The nurse was crying as she attempted to bandage my wounds. A large breasted woman rushed in and shot healing chakra through my wrist. I began screaming at the top of my lungs as I realized I was going to live. Iruka rushed into the room tears streaming down his eyes. I forced my body to roll of the bed and began banging my head as hard as I could against the tile causing blood to smear with my tears. I began shouting profanities at the large breasted medic. "NO!NO! NO! I WANTED TO DIE! NO!NO!" I was screaming as she lifted me with ease. I jerked and squirmed. The wounds had been closed. I was crying uncontrollably. Weezeing words of profanity. She strapped my arms on each side of me doing the same with both of my ankles. "Naruto I'm sorry that it has to be like this," she said with tears flooding down her eyes "I'm so sorry." With that she left and Iruka stepped forward. His face was soaked with tears and his eyes blood shot and red. I could tell he wanted to say something but just couldn't. Fresh tears rolled down my face. I began coughing roughly. My body began to shake and I could feel the blood spilling out of my mouth and trickling down my chin and neck. I couldn't breath. I had just noticed Iruka rushing back into the room with three medic ninja flanking him. I also saw the man in the mask squeeze in not far after. He was saying something but I couldn't hear anything over my coughs. My vision began to fill with red. Was I dieing? Was it finally over? The red slowly faded to black and I was unconscious.

**AN: it's over. No not the story but the chapter. It was short but a lot happened in it. I had to put his attempted suicide in here somewhere. Please review. Scorches will be removed. **

**P.S Comp. Still having problems . .**

**don't hate :P **


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